State park rangers presented a surprised pair of hikers with a summit-top champagne toast today to celebrate the one-millionth second date held on the Seattle area’s top make-or-break fitness test for potential romantic partners: Mount Si.

Couple Grace Shipley and Marcus Thompson reported that they hit it off so well on their initial coffee date, they agreed the natural next step was getting to know each other even better on eight miles of switchbacks up and down 3,200 feet of elevation. 

“It’s nice to know if someone’s fit enough to appreciate the outdoors, my first love, with me,” said Thompson. “And is there really any better way to gauge a guy’s ego and level of sanity than seeing if he actually scrambles The Haystack?”

Park Ranger David Sanchez says second dates come at a special time in human courtship: The terrain and time commitment of the Mount Si trail are too extreme for most first dates and field studies indicate that by the third or fourth date, people settle in for “Netflix and chill” hibernation for the rest of the year.

“It’s especially exciting when one of our second date pairs return years after mating,” Sanchez said. “You see them trying to lead their young back up the trail where they cemented their courtship while telling them to stop licking every salty rock and hiker — just adorable!”

At press time, Shipley and Thompson said they were ready to curl up together on a couch and watch Free Solo.

Previous articleIn Touching Final Move of Conference Solidarity with Washington State, UW Cougs It
Next articleSeahawks Honor Pete Carroll By Hanging His Gum From the Rafters