Nature lovers rejoiced in Seattle today as massive flocks of Green Lake-native paddle boarders started their annual migration I-5 South to warmer California climes.
“Nature really is majestic, isn’t it?” said Kathy Robinson, hobbyist board watcher, peering through her binoculars from her perch on an I-5 overpass. “The graceful rhythm of their paddling, the rippling muscles of their powerful arms as they drag their boards across the weathered concrete of the interstate. I hate to see them go, but I love to watch them leave.”
Experts say there could be a record migration south this year in particular.
“We’re on the cusp of a super-migration converging on I-5, but with the increased numbers comes increased risk. We’ve seen a number of boarders upended in potholes, and an alarming rise in predatory attacks from their natural enemies, the goose,” said Herb Stevens, migration researcher at the University of Washington. “The HOV lane is at capacity, and their ‘Good to Go!’ passes are sliding off their glistening, oiled bodies. We’re monitoring the situation, but we have to be careful not to intervene with Mother Nature’s plan.”
Despite their inevitable migration obstacles, Stevens said he still expects the majority of paddle boarders to return next year tanned with portable speakers squawking Sublime by early July.
