Following increased public pressure to walk its talk on the fight against climate change, today Amazon unveiled a “Clean Leave” policy today that promises all pink slips handed to union workers now will be 100% recyclable.
“We knew that simply renaming Key Arena as Climate Pledge Arena would not be enough,” said Jay Carney, Amazon’s Senior Vice President of Global Corporate Affairs. “That is why when firing workers who attempt to effectively unionize against predatory and exploitive working conditions, you can be sure from now on the carbon footprint is minimal.”
In addition to bringing Amazon’s firing policy into a green new future, Amazon says the move is also expected to result in more layoffs that will enable safer social distancing for workers.
“In addition to our frontline heroes being less likely to transmit the virus now, they’re also less likely to transmit ideas that may inspire a workforce to effectively fight for its basic survival,” Carney said. “Really, it’s a win-win for everyone–did I mention that the pink slips are also completely biodegradable?”
Though met with some criticism for firing people amidst the nation’s record unemployment, Amazon says the pink slips are merely asking former employees to “stay home, stay healthy.”
